Why put yourself through the rigmarole of the relationship so young? I can't say I have not been there, because in high school that was me. And I really thought I was ready for everything: college, the long-distance relationship thing, all of it. But I think as life's experiences roll on and you begin to see what and why some things happen. I can't say I didn't enjoy being a boyfriend, because I really did, and will in future when time and circumstances permit. However it still, in my youth, is my position that maybe things shouldn't be rushed. Maybe we should all be friends and then continue in that mutual caring spirit. That's not to say that we as the collective whole don't, but sometimes because of sheer physical attraction we can cloud our judgment.
In the end I've found it very fulfilling that I can remain friends, I think and hope, with the girls in my life, and that's it. I do go back and forth with the whole: "well should I date or shouldn't I?" question, and therefore the ambiguity of my actions with them can be misleading. But in the end, for my own sake I try not to get too involved because growing up has afforded me a different view on things and so I now if I first accept and love and work on myself then I can I begin to entertain doing the same for another young woman. It's just the growing up I guess...
well said my friend. relationships will not work if both people don not know, love and cherish themselves and most 19 year old's (myself included) do not know, love or cherish themselves well enough to do the same for another person for an extended period of time. that being said relationships can be very useful for fulling one's sexual needs and desires. so they can bu useful if you can wield them well. granted these aforementioned relationships are for lack of a better word bullshit and someone will most likely end up being hurt. One a somewhat related note i feel as if the "love" word is thrown around too freely these day. it's almost as if it's a prerequisite to being in a relationship longer than a month. why must we say we love each other? i'm not even positive what love is at this point in my life. i have an idea, but i'm not sure. i think once one person says it the other feels an obligation to this person that they care about to not "let them down" by not saying it. why cant we just be together and not say i love you? idk soemthing to think about
ReplyDeleteAnonymous:
ReplyDeleteI agree; there is a certain gilded sentiment people give into to make things seem real and legit. Sometimes our collective politic is mislead by what we all perceive as being love, in this case - the saying 'I love you" or the sexual practices all are suppose to signify a 'genuine' love. However I would argue that these things sit opposite what 'real' love is. However it is in living and caring for people that we define what love is relative to our lives and experiences I presume. Whatever it truly is, it definitely is a growing and learning process.